Cleaning Up

Oh how the time flies. It's amazing how many days can just whiz past me without even realizing that I haven't posted! It's also amazing how far we can float away from Him if we aren't constantly swimming that direction. It reminds me of Pilgrim's Progress: breaks are bad! There are times of renewal, and there are the times we get lazy. They actually aren't difficult to distinguish with the tiniest bit of discernment, but our sin convinces us of a false reality, and we are lulled into a spiritual sleep. "There is a way that seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death" ~ Proverbs 14:12.

I must confess that I am guilty of this. I didn't post for a while and started hearing myself say, "It's ok. You're tired. God wants you to sleep." While I'm sure it's true that God wants us to take care of ourselves and be responsible with our bodies, part of that being getting a good night's sleep, I think that this excuse is extremely deceptive, because it focuses on the effect rather than the cause. I notice that it's not God's fault that I dont get enough sleep. It's not because He requires too much time out of my day for seeking Him that I end up awake at ungodly hours of the night (or morning; pun not intended). If we look carefully we can see that this is completely the wrong attitude. The reason I'm up late is because I require too much time out of His day for entertaining myself. Subtle. Dangerous. Yet I'm confident that if we take on this attitude of humility and devote our days to Him, we will be blessed. "Blessings crown the head of the righteous" ~ Proverbs 10:6.

Actually, this whole thought process occurred to me when I got up from my desk last night. I looked at it, but didn't see it - I couldn't see it. Not through all the junk that was strewn around on it, under it, over it, and wherever else you could think of where to put something on a desk. Socks that had been kicked off were plentiful (yea, it was that sick), trash that hadn't been thrown away was everywhere, and there was an excess of unorganized paper. This all resulted in a lack of desk space on which to do my work, and added to the stressfulness of homework. I realized that in the last few days, my relationship with Christ had begun to degrade in the same direction, if not to the same point, as my desk. This was a result of lost time carried over from past days in which I decided to watch TV over addressing responsibilities such as Bible study or homework.

Note that TV isn't necessarily wrong, but what we forget is how incredibly destructive it can be when not used in a positive manner. We also forget how easily it can be used in a negative manner. It tends to eat up a lot of time, and I don't know about you, but I find that many times I get up from the couch thinking "Why did I just waste my time sitting mindlessly in front of that screen?" I don't want to condemn television. It can be used for good. For example, Bobby and friends witnessed Shark Week on TV. The difference is that he made a spiritual connection with it. It had a deeper purpose than cheap laughs or cheap thrills like most shows offer. That's what we should shoot for: the deeper meaning, God in creation, God everywhere, through everything, all the time. Anything else is settling for less, and that's not what God wants in our lives. When we consider anything more important or urgent than Christ and our relationship with Him, we break rule #1: "Jesus replied: ' "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment' " ~ Matthew 22:37-38.

Anyways... I realized that my desk was dirty like my heart, and it needed cleaning. While I can clean my desk, I cannot clean my own heart: only God can do that. I also realized that if I constantly had a mindset of keeping my desk organized, I wouldn't have to face the consequences of the less than optimal working conditions and stress. This reminded me that I should constantly be doing house keeping on my heart. I let things pile up with the excuse that it's all organized up here. ::points to head:: Unfortunately, my mind has limits to this organization talent, and then there's an overwhelming amount of stuff to deal with that I don't feel I have the energy to deal with. Again, this is analagous to our struggle with sin. If I ever have to say "I've got it under control" to my sin, let that be a bright red flashing light in my mind telling me to confess pride along with everything else. "Most men will proclaim each his own goodness, But who can find a faithful man?" ~ Proverbs 20:6.

Hope you missed me.

In Him,
Evan

P.S. Time to go to sleep, praying that my 6 hours feel like 8.